Getting Laid After Lockdown

31 Jul 2020 - 17:59
Couple Getting Laid after Lockdown

Apparently, if you have 20/20 vision you have perfect eyesight, or at least that's what the opticians tell us. However, our vision within 2020 is definitely not so perfect with many of us struggling to navigate our way through the challenges life after lockdown has brought.

I mean let's be honest, if you were single when the pandemic began then like many of us you were wondering what this would mean for your sex life; especially considering the Government's advice was

Stay home.
Protect the NHS.
Save lives.

Which to us sounded more like...

You're single.
Sex is off the cards.
Do not have sex.

We would lie in bed curled into the shape of a question mark asking ourselves "Why is this happening to me? Will I ever get to find another Friend With Benefits? What if I forget how to have sex?"

You may find this behaviour rather dramatic; but we were all thinking irrationally during that time. I mean, back then, people were literally fighting over toilet paper, not the double quilted kind either, they would physically fight over the "Smart Price" sandpaper kind - it was absolute mayhem!

My point is, if people were losing their minds during lockdown then could us sex-starved singles be at risk of losing the skills we had acquired in the bedroom?

With these harrowing thoughts in mind we carried out some research to uncover how the pandemic will really impact casual dating.

After lockdown will there be a massive increase in no strings dating?

Well, based on what we know from the ease of lockdown so far there has been a huge surge in casual hookups with those feeling desperate to find a friend with benefits just in case we revert to being in lockdown again! One Twitter user comically claimed "I'll be popping morning after pills like Smarties now lockdown has relaxed"

We strongly advise against this.

However, it seems with all that bottled up sexual energy people are going wild and finding the best way to quickly find that perfect friend with benefits is by searching through an adult dating website.

Will people be any kinkier after lockdown?

Hell yeah! People have been sat at home horny and using adult tube sites to get them through this tough time and if you have ever visited a tube site you will know that the longer you spend searching through the videos the freakier they get!

In fact, more and more people are wanting to include toys in their 'play time' and men are no longer as insecure about women relying on a toy to help her reach the big "O". If lockdown has taught us anything, it is that we all need a little bit of help from time to time!

What should you do now?

Get yourself signed up to a dating site specifically focused on friends with benefits as BoJo has himself advised that 'we should prepare for a second wave" and with that in mind you should probably line up someone to sit within your bubble for some care-free casual fun in advance.

On these types of sites you can search for like-minded singles by hair colour, eye colour, height, build, favourite position and so much more, so why wait to face lockdown alone again when you can find your friend with benefits today!